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Thoughts on Thanksgiving

I have a huge problem with getting stuck in the stereotype category of "senioritis" since I happen to be in my senior year of high school. I believe the biggest mistake young people make is trying too hard to "find themselves." Our culture tells us that we need to take a year off of college, or travel the world to find out who we really are. If there is anything I can say that I've learned this year, it's that staying where you are and diving into Christ is the best place to find everything you're looking for.
I've been so blessed to have great events that have assisted me with my journey. I'm still attending Bible Study with some home schoolers, and it's been even more of a blessing to be able to take Reid along with me this year. We're using the Focus on the Family's "Truth Project" videos for this year, and they have been extremely interesting. We've studied different world views, and ways to live in society.
I'm learning every day that I have so much more to learn. Tim had a great way of explaining this. He held his arms shoulder length apart, thus making two sides of a box. He said to imagine that this box contains all the knowledge that anyone in the world has ever learned, or ever will learn. Now imagine how much of this knowledge you will learn in your life. Makes you feel pretty small, right? People have dedicated their lives to a single topic, learning everything they can about it. But maybe a few years later another person will find a missing piece of information that makes the old information meaningless. Scientists are constantly discovering new cures and medicines. Remember in Jane Austen's day when they thought bleeding would cure people of their illness? Now we know that this in fact makes it worse!
I find myself disturbingly immersed in college applications. As my dad likes to remind me, when he went to college he just told Kansas State he was coming and sent them a check! My how the times have changed... The University of Dallas requires four short essays, one long essay, a letter from my teacher, AND a letter from an outside influence! This was the first of my undertakings, and the process still hasn't ended. I'm flying down to Dallas on Wednesday for an interview with the French Department. I know it's a lot of work, and at 11pm, I'm wondering if I should be spending more time on other schools, but right now this is where God wants me to be. I think the people who regret their college experience didn't include God in their decision. Just like in some marriages, we make the decisions and then ask God to bless them. Oh how great the world's joy would be if we reversed this process!
We we're blessed enough to have the National Catholic Youth Conference come to Kansas City last weekend. My mom took a group of six boys and girls down for the Thursday through Saturday events. Jason Evert and his wife were two of the main speakers, and I was moved by their talks. Anyone who knows me knows that the subject of Love is one of my favorites. I would love to give chastity talks in the future. After waiting in line for about an hour, I finally got a signed copy of their book "If You Really Loved Me." I'm still reading it, so I'll post more when I finish it.
French class is still going good, and I've decided to continue taking it in the spring. There are some really great people in my class, and we have a great coffee study group started.
Finally, I'd like to share my thoughts on Thanksgiving. Before this week I've only told this story to one person, but I felt like my Blog was a fitting place to share it. I'm against most holidays. In fact Halloween is about the only one that I fully understand. If you need a day to tell the people in your life how much you love them, you don't deserve to tell them. If you need a day to be thankful, you don't deserve to say the words! Understand what I mean? So for everyone that reads this, I am just as thankful for you all today as I was yesterday, and as I will be tomorrow. You are all wonderful people, and I've been so blessed to have you in my life.
I hope this catches everyone up on what's been going on in my life, and that you had a wonderful and blessed Thanksgiving!

Marriable

I just finished reading the book Marriable by Hayley and Michael DiMarco. Alyx gave it to me, and the Omaha hockey trip was the perfect amount of time to finish it.

To quickly sum up why I loved this book, it's because it's not like other books!

I know, I know...every single book will say that they are not like the others. And one must admit, that this is true. Every book is told just a little bit different. But it seems that the message and meaning are always the same. Don't date until you're ready to get married. Follow Christian teaching. Guard you're heart. And while this book says those things too, it does so in a totally different way!

I've read Josh Harris' book I Kissed Dating Goodbye, along with many others. But this one stated the point, and then moved on! (yes Josh Harris...moved on!) It was humorous, and fast paced. I wanted to be reading it!

It stated the 10 most common lies that guys will tell girls. I talked about being friends with the opposite sex, and how only gay people marry their best friend.

There were many parts of the book that I would like to post, but I will stick to one, and you can read the rest (after Kristen, who currently has it).

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Top 10 Rejection Lines Given by Women (and what they actually mean)

10. I think of you as a brother (I don't want to kiss you, ever.)

9. There's a slight difference in our ages (I'm not Mary Kay LeTourneau or Anna Nicole Smith.)

8. I'm not attracted to you in that way (again, I don't want to kiss you, ever.)

7. My life is too complicated right now (Instead of "you complete me," you complicate me.)

6. I've got a boyfriend (And his name is TiVo.)

5. I don't date men where I work (And if you quit, I still work on Earth.)

4. It's not you, it's me (It's me not wanting to date you.)

3. I'm concentrating on my career (Until I find someone that I see a future with.)

2. I'm celibate (How many times do I have to say it? I don't want to kiss you!)

1. Let's be friends (You won't mind when I tell you about all the other guys I meet and have a crush on, will you?)

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Top 10 Rejection Lines Given by Men (and what they actually mean)

10. I think of you as a sister (I'm just not attracted to you.)

9. There's a slight difference in our ages (I'm just not attracted to you.)

8. I'm not attracted to you in that way (Um, what he said.)

7. My life is too complicated right now (I can't keep juggling you and dating my new crush.)

6. I've got a girlfriend (I'm just not attracted to you enough to dump her.)

5. I don't date women where I work (I see a nasty breakup in our future, and I need this job.)

4. It's not you, it's me (It's you.)

3. I'm concentrating on my career (I'm just not attracted to you.)

2. I'm celibate (This is getting redundant...)

1. Let's be friends ( I value you as an important influence in my life and can't imagine navigating my free time without you being a part of it. Did I mention that I'm just not attracted to you?)

Thought for this week...

The only thing we should fear is losing the ones we love...

Comment with your thoughts!
Do agree with this, or not?

A letter from God to us women

When I created the heavens and the earth, I spoke them into being. When I created man, I formed him and breathed life into his nostrils. But you, woman, I fashioned after I breathed the breath of life into man because your nostrils are too delicate. I allowed a deep sleep to come over him so I could patiently and perfectly fashion you. Man was put to sleep so that he could not interfere with the creativity.
From one bone, I fashioned you. I chose the bone that protects man's life. I chose the rib, which protects his heart and lungs and supports him, as you are meant to do. Around this one bone, I shaped you.... I modeled you. I created you perfectly and beautifully.
Your characteristics are as the rib, strong yet delicate and fragile. You provide protection for the most delicate organ in man, his heart. His heart is the center of his being; his lungs hold the breath of life. The rib cage will allow itself to be broken before it will allow damage to the heart. Support man as the rib cage supports the body. You were not taken from his feet, to be under him, nor were you taken from his head, to be above him. You were taken from his side, to stand beside him and be held close to his side.
You are my perfect angel.....You are my beautiful little girl. You have grown to be a splendid woman of excellence and my eyes fill when I see the virtues in your heart.
Your eyes......don't change them.
Your lips - how lovely when they part in prayer.
Your nose, so perfect in form.
Your hands so gentle to touch.
I've caressed your face in your deepest sleep.
I've held your heart close to mine.
Of all that lives and breathes, you are most like me. Adam walked with me in the cool of the day, yet he was lonely. He could not see me or touch me. He could only feel me. So everything I wanted Adam to share and experience with me, I fashioned in you; my holiness, my strength, my purity, my love, my protection and support. You are special because you are an extension of me. Man represents my image, woman my emotions. Together, you represent the totality of God.
So man......treat women well. Love her, respect her, for she is fragile but yet strong at the same time.

~Author unknown

KCYC: Sex is not a dirty word

Last weekend some girls from my youth group went to KCYC (Kansas City Youth Conference).
There were lots of talks, but this was one of my favorites. I took lots of notes and wanted to share them with you all.

He started off his talk by asking everyone the question "what was the first commandment in the Bible?" Some said 'love God' others said 'love your neighbor', but he replied with:
GENESIS 1:28: "Be fruitful and multiply" GOD SAID HAVE SEX! Having sex is not wrong, it is only wrong outside of marriage.
He then showed us a camera. He said "now if my wife gave me this camera, its mine right? So I can do with it whatever I want to, right? So if I throw it on the floor, its ok because its mine...right? It might not work very well in the future when I need it, but its mine, so I can use it how I want. Well in the same way God gave us the gift of sex. But if we use it before marriage, then it won't work the correct way when we need it."

The Catechism of the Catholic Church says that "sex is meant to be a joy and a pleasure". The Church is not against sex.

In the Bible Jesus calls us His sons and daughters. And if Christ is the King, then we are all princesses. How many times do girls today forget this? We think that we are not good enough, when really, no one else is good enough for us!

The world has two arguments with Chastity:
1. The Church is Old Fashioned.
Yes the Church might be old fashioned, but God invented sex. He could have made 10,000 different ways to create children. He could have said touch foreheads and rub your knees together, but He didn't.
2. There going to do it anyways.
Well no, everyone is not going it! And if more teens knew that not everyone was having sex, the abortion rate would be a lot less!

Chastity doesn't happen over night. When a man has image imprinted on his brain, it can stay there for over 30 years. How many of you want some random guy at the mall, whom you don't know, remembering what you look like for the next 30 years? I didn't think so. God made the brain this way, so that on a couples wedding night, that man would remember it for the rest of his life. That's why old people look so cute together, because she is still the love of his life.
(ok this wasn't from KCYC, it was from my cousin, but I really liked it!)

I will be posting things from the other talks at a later time. Enjoy!

Love...

Explain the wedding garment to us, you will say. There is no doubt at all that it is a garment which only the good have, those who are to be left at the banquet, preserved for the banquet to which no bad person has access, to be brought through to it by the grace of the Lord. These are the ones who have on the wedding garment.

So what is that wedding garment? This is the wedding garment: "But the goal of the commandment," says the apostle, "is love from a pure heart, and from a good conscience and from an unfeigned faith." That is the wedding garment. Not any sort of love; even people after all, who are companions in a bad conscience are often enough seen to love each other. Those who commit armed robberies together, who engage together in witchcraft, who share their devotion to play-actors, who yell encouragement to their favorite charioteers and huntsmen, they all, very often, love each other. But you don't find in them "love from a pure heart, and from a good conscience and from an unfeigned faith." It's only such love that is the wedding garment.

-Saint Augustine (concerning Matthew 22:1-10)

Alright, lets put this in 21st century English. Love from a pure heart is the only kind of "true love". Yes, lots of people are able to love. I'm not saying that they don't love each other. But the only true love comes from those who have a pure heart.

"In so many millennia, the humans never did figure love out. How much is physical, how much in the mind? How much accident and how much fate? Why did perfect matches crumble and impossible couples thrive? I don't know the answers any better than they did. Love simply is where it is." (from the book 'The Host')

Lady in Waiting

My wonderful friend Alyx has decided to start a Bible study! I am so very excited! We will be reading and discussing the book "Lady in Waiting" (the book she based her speech on). The date is not set yet, but I believe that we will be meeting on Sunday nights. The book is all about accepting single-hood with open arms, and believing that you don't need a guy to complete your life. It is all Bible based and yes, it is a courtship book. :)

Its a good chance to have a girls night out filled with good conversation and lots of laughs. If you are interested in coming please email me at pinkdancer92@gmail.com or call my cell.

Twilight

"Stephenie Meyer revealed that Twilight's vampire Edward Cullen is a subconscious combination of her three favourite leading men: Jane Eyre's Edward Rochester, Pride and Prejudice's Fitzwilliam Darcy and Anne of Green Gables' Gilbert Blythe."

How...interesting!

As most of you know I did read all four of the books. My mother didn't like it very much that I spent almost two weeks in bed because of it. (only getting up to shower and eat!)

I think that her books are very well written. Just like any of the classics listed above.

One of my favorite quotes from Twilight is "Romeo was one of my favorite fictional characters...until I met Edward."

You know from the start that Edward is perfection itself. Just like you are drawn to feel about the other Heroes.

In a conversation with Hannah I said "Out of all the courtship books I have read, this book made it all finally make since to me!" It showed me that you should wait until your "perfection" comes along. You don't need to settle for any less than that. Wait for Edward! Wait for your perfection!

Chastity: What are you saying Yes to?

While at the Catholic Family Conference in Wichita, my Dad picked up a brochure for me entitled "Chastity: What are you saying Yes to?" I really liked the thoughts it shared.
1. Chastity is saying Yes to authentic, real love.
Love is a deep desire to do what is good for another. It involves sacrifice.
2. Chastity is saying Yes to you.
Chastity says "I believe that I am worth waiting for. I am a unique unrepeatable person who has a unique unrepeatable gift to offer."
3. Chastity is saying Yes to your future spouse.
"I have prepared myself for you!"
4. Chastity is saying Yes to a great future.
Don't mess with your future and the happiness the Lord longs for you to enjoy!
5. Chastity is saying Yes to God.
God's plans are not shallow and mediocre. They are Great! He has set the bar high because He wants what is truly best for us and knows the deepest desires of our hearts. Chastity says Yes to the fullness of God's plans for you. Give your life to Christ and live daily for Him; you will have more adventure than you know what to do with!

Finding True Love in Christ

My friend Alyx recently wrote this. She was asked to give a talk on courtship, and this was her pre-speech, get some ideas down on paper. She said that once she started she just couldn't stop. She also said that most of her ideas came from the book 'Lady in Waiting' which I just ordered so that I could read it as well.


Your girlhood dreams of becoming a princess may have become grown up dreams of finding a prince to marry -- a man who'll make you blissfully happy. But no such man exists, because no human being has the power to make your dreams come true.That doesn't mean you need to stop dreaming, however. You do, indeed, have a prince waiting for you. And if you discover Him, you'll experience the greatest love of all.Here's how you can devote your heart to your true prince, Jesus Christ:Don't settle for a broken heart and shattered dreams. Even though this fallen world is full of sin that can disappoint and even destroy you, it's also full of hope. Don't assume that you'll never meet a man you can trust, who'll treat you with dignity and respect. Pass untrustworthy men by while you wait for one who'll treat you right. Refuse to lower your standards for relationships. Pursue only the best -- all that God wants for you. Don't sink into depression when your wait takes longer than you'd like. Instead, use your time to live to the fullest, growing as a person and enjoying all God has for you while you're single.Place your faith in Jesus alone. Realize that it's futile to expect a man to fulfill your deepest desires. Don't put pressure on any man to rescue you from your circumstances and make your dreams come true. Instead, make your relationship with Jesus your top priority, and expect to see everything else in your life fall into place as a result of that relationship. Trust Jesus alone with your hopes and dreams.Make Jesus the foundation of your life. It's not enough to try to fit Jesus into your life; you need to fit your life around Jesus. If you just utter some quick prayers occasionally and don't hear any reply, that doesn't mean you need to figure life out on your own. It means that you need to deepen your relationship with Jesus so you can discover His great plans for you. Commit to wholeheartedly pursuing a relationship with Jesus -- the Prince who made the ultimate romantic gesture by giving up His life to save you. Just as He gave everything for you, decide to give your all for Him, out of love. Make Jesus the center of your existence.Turn your heart into a sanctuary. Set your heart apart from the world and guard it to become a sanctuary for the Holy Spirit to reside. Ask God to show you the trash that's lurking inside your heart and needs to be removed to prepare a proper place for your Prince to live. As He reveals the kind of trash you need to remove -- from small lies and unhealthy compromises to traumatic memories and deep bitterness -- write it all down and pray about each piece of trash specifically. Don't allow any sin to clutter up your heart. Take action to remove it however God calls you to -- from apologizing to people you've hurt or disrespected to throwing away items that fostered sin in your life (such as seductive clothes you wore to attract unhealthy attention from men, or CDs of music that celebrated impurity). Examine your heart again regularly, making trash removal an ongoing process in your life. Whenever you notice that you've allowed any wrong habits to creep back into your life, or whenever you encounter a situation or relationship that needs to be made right, take action as God leads you.Kick out other lovers. Don't allow any person or thing in your life to take away time, thoughts, energy, or devotion that you should be giving to Jesus. Take a hard look at what you've been pursuing -- romantic relationships, popularity, comfort, material possessions, achievements, and more -- and honestly consider how your pursuit of them may be keeping you from pursuing Jesus wholeheartedly. Then eliminate activities that distract you from growing closer to Jesus, and change your goals so that your life is truly focused on Him. Don't worry about feeling deprived by cutting out unhealthy attachments from your life. Once you pursue intimacy with Jesus above all else, you'll discover that your relationship with Him will actually enhance every part of your life.Change your lifestyle. Ask God to show you what practical changes you can make to your life so you'll be better able to develop a closer relationship with Jesus -- from waking up earlier each day to pray more and watching less television, to tackling a service project and making more an effort to share your faith with others.Embrace God's dreams for you. Be willing to give up your personal agendas in order to embrace God's better dreams for you. Trust that God, who created you, knows what plans are best for you. Pursue His dreams for your life rather than your own.Set your heart apart for your future husband. Make a commitment to keep yourself sexually pure as a gift not only to God, but also to the man you may eventually marry. Ask yourself: "Am I truly set apart for my future husband? Or am I just doing the bare minimum for him by putting up a few physical and/or emotional boundaries in my life?", "Do I seek male affirmation through flirting, hugging, touching, etc.?", "Do I draw guys' attention by showing off my body?", "Do I casually offer my heart, mind, emotions, and body to guys by jumping into short-term flings?", "Do I allow my mind to fantasize about guys I'm attracted to?", "Do I offer too much of myself to guys, even in friendships?", "Am I willing to sacrifice pleasure, attention, affirmation, and temporary fulfillment to live a lifestyle of lily whiteness for the man I will spend the rest of my life with?", "Am I willing to allow my faithful Lord to bring a love story into my life in His own perfect time and way?", and "Am I willing to hand over the pen of my love story to Jesus and trust Him completely?". Write your future husband a letter to solidify your purity decisions, and read that letter whenever you struggle with purity. Ask God to forgive your previous sins of impurity, as well as to help you heal from whatever sexual sins have been committed against you (such as through abuse). Also ask God to help your future husband live a life a sexual purity himself.Protect your intimacy with God on a daily basis. Be alert to any and every sin that tries to encroach upon your inner sanctuary and lessen your intimacy with God. Every day, pay attention to what you're thinking, saying, and doing, and consider whether or not that pleases God. Repent immediately of whatever doesn't reflect the love you should have toward your true Prince.Overcome temptation. Although you'll often be tempted to sin, you can always resist temptation if you don't give it an opportunity to grow in your mind. At every crucial moment of making a decision about how to respond to temptation, say "no" to it. Then the temptation will have no chance to grow, causing it to lose its power over you. Read the Bible often, and study, memorize, and meditate on its words so you can absorb its truths into your mind. Whenever you encounter temptation, the Holy Spirit will then remind you of biblical truths that will help you overcome the lies temptation tries to tell you. Don't hesitate to pray against all forms of evil that are enticing you to cave into temptation. Identify the areas of your life where you're most vulnerable to temptation, then use the spiritual authority you have as a Christian to pray for deliverance from evil that's trying to harm you in those areas. Create boundaries for your behavior to protect yourself from unnecessary temptation, such as refusing to watch movies that tempt you to engage in sexual impurity or avoiding nightclubs where impure behavior surrounds you. Ask yourself: "Are there voices I need to start ignoring?", "Are there shows or movies I need to stop watching?", "Are there places I need to stop going?", "Are there people I need to stop spending time with?", "Are there certain clothes I need to stop wearing?" and "Are there songs I need to stop listening to?". If any friendship, activity, or influence tends to draw you away from Jesus or keeps you from reflecting His purity, create a boundary around it. Guard your relationship with your true Prince, no matter what the cost, knowing that it's always worthwhile to do so.Don't compromise your standards in romantic relationships. Value the high standards to which God has called you (for your own good) more than you value romance itself. Ask God to help you be willing to live a set-apart life out of love for Him, even if you never find a man who's worth marrying. Set yourself apart for your true Prince no matter what happens in your future. Making that decision will give you the confidence and strength you need for every circumstance you'll ever encounter. It's better to remain single than to settle for a romantic relationship with a man who doesn't treat you as God wants you to be treated. But be assured that many worthwhile men do exist. Look for men who enjoy intimate relationships with Jesus and show integrity, compassion, courage, and selfless love -- men who will help you protect your inner sanctuary. Pursue a romantic relationship that draws you closer to Jesus, while avoiding those that draw you farther away from Jesus.Cultivate ongoing intimacy with God. Your relationship with God doesn't have limits. There's always more you can learn about Him, always more to worship in Him, and always more to experience with Him. Develop a lifestyle that helps you constantly grow closer to God. Study the Bible often. Write your prayers down in a journal, like personal letters to your true Prince, and write down His responses to your prayers. Read great Christian literature to learn how to deepen your relationship with God. View every challenge as an opportunity to grow closer to God and every triumph as an opportunity to praise God.Delight in God. Learn how to notice God's constant presence with you, and delight in Him moment by moment. Ask Him to help you speak and listen to Him no matter where you are or what you're doing. Develop a quiet mind. Cultivate a heart of worship. Meditate on the Bible. As you walk through each day with God rather than just representing Him, you'll experience unshakable peace and strength in every situation.Pursue healing if you've had your heart broken. It's crucial to heal from a broken heart before you can be ready for true intimacy -- both with God and with your future spouse. Ask God to reveal what mistakes you made in the broken relationship, and to help you learn from them. Forgive yourself and the person who hurt you. Ask God to give you His perspective on what you've gone through, and to help you see yourself as He sees you -- someone who is extremely valuable and deeply loved. Find some people you can trust to talk through issues and encourage you as you deal with pain while going through the healing process.Build spiritual oneness with a potential romantic partner. Don't rush into romance with any man, no matter how promising he seems. First, savor a season of friendship, getting to know each other well without the pressure of romance. Keep an open hand, refusing to hold on to the relationship too tightly. Trust God to do whatever He sees fit with the relationship, remembering that He wants the absolute best for both of you.